One of the main concerns of parents when they carry out their child's education are the moments when the child discusses the rules or does not heed what is asked of him. When this happens, it is important that parents know how to identify when disobedient behavior occurs so that they can act accordingly and continue with their child's education.
In general, they are considereddisobedient those behaviors that children do not perform despite having been given a specific order.A typical example of this is when they are asked to turn off the television and after about 20 seconds they are still watching it. They also disobey when they don't meet standards they know (like washing hands before meals).
It is important that parents establish a set of limits, norms and, above all, social values, so that the child has a solid base on which to act as he grows. It should not be forgotten that children, especially in their first years of life they learn from their parents' exampleTherefore, their behavior is essential to set the social and moral norms of the child in the future.
As they grow, children expand their social circle, being able to receive greater influence from friends or classmates. If this influence is not positive it can get to distort some of the child's behaviors, especially, if he is not sure what is the correct behavior in each situation.
Parents are responsible for ensuring that they are not encouraging unruly behavior in their children. It's as simple as asking yourself these questions:
- How do we relate at home?
- Do we communicate assertively and peacefully?
- Do we listen to the child and try to talk and come to terms with him when he wants something?
- Do we set the limits well in a non-authoritarian way and for no apparent reason?
- Do we encourage cooperation and responsibility at home?
1. Not having clear limits and rules
Parents should review the educational model they follow. Are your children clear about limits?
2. Conduct disorder
When the child is clear about the rules but continues to disobey, the child may have some type of disorder that makes it difficult for him to control his behavior. Although suffering from a disorder does not always lead to bad behavior, there is a greater predisposition to it because of lack of self-esteem and insecurity that some children suffer.
For this reason, sometimes pushing boundaries is an effective way to get the attention of the adult to get attention, even if it is through punishment.
Among the disorders that cause rebellious behavior in children are:
- He Attention deficit disorder (ADHD)
That causes confrontations with parents, teachers and classmates due to the impulsive attitude that children who suffer from it usually have.
- He Negative-defiant, characterized by frequent tantrums and constant questioning of the rules.
This is usually due to a poor development of cognitive and emotional skills, which prevents meeting the demands of the environment and following orders that come from figures with greater authority.
When suspecting that it is a disorder, I always recommend going to a center that performs a diagnosis and a multidisciplinary approach to the problem to clear up doubts and help the child to redirect their behavior as soon as possible.
If your children find it difficult to obey, especially in the tasks that they must complete at home, such as making the bed, brushing their teeth or listening to you, perhaps the perfect time to play with the method The tree of achievements.
What is it about? Well, it is a very fun and simple resource, aimed at children from 3 to 10 years old, with which you can not only make children follow the rules but also enhance their autonomy, increase their self-esteem and motivate their responsibility, to through positive reinforcement. Try playing with your children by TREE OF ACHIEVEMENTS. You will tell us.
You can read more articles similar to Why children are disobedient, in the category of Conduct on site.